Home > Uncategorized > How to spot a Douche-Bag

How to spot a Douche-Bag

My fellow male, Rami Zahran, put up an excellent post to help Woo-Men indentify what a good husband is like by using economic theory. Well written my friend.

Rami makes an awesome point at the end, which is the fact that good women always seem to fall for Douchebags.

What is a douchebag?



Why and how women are attracted to the above is still a mystery to me, Rami and probably every single decent man out there (Yes, this means i think that Rami and myself are NOT douchebags!!!)

To help you identify what a douchebag is, i did my research and have come up with several pointers to help you spot them:

  • They wear sunglasses at night
  • They “POP” their collars
  • They yell “WOOOOO” in public for no apparent reason
  • They order a salad as a starter
  • They fight over what protein brand is best for muscle growth
  • They refer to things they don’t like as gay
  • They carry condoms in their wallets
  • The amount of gel they put on their hair could lubricate an army tank
  • Their sentences begin with the words “DUDE” or “BRO”
  • They post topless pics of themselves
  • They wear shirts that are 2 sizes smaller than what actually fits
  • They BELIEVE that every girl wants them
  • They go on and on and on about how they got a hot chick’s number
  • They blast loud music out of the windows of their cars
  • They believe they are the center of the universe
  • They treat women as objects
  • They stare at a women’s chest during a conversation
  • Their chests are bigger than their girlfriends
  • They drive over sized cars to compensate for their small.. mmm.. weeners?
  • They own neckwear
  • They treat their girlfriends like shit and they blame it on her
  • They brag about all the hot, sexy girls they have slept with
  • They pretend to be artful
  • They act like rock stars
  • They are arrogant
  • They spend 1 hour deciding what to wear to a club
  • They are obnoxious
  • They find ANY excuse to take their shirts off
  • They wax their chests
  • They occasionally mention how much they can bench press
  • They name their genitals
  • They own a pair of white pants
  • They own a pair of white LV loafers
  • They share too much info
  • They tip their caps to the side
  • They own more than 1 pair of sandals
  • They drive around with half-open tinted windows
  • They have an over-inflated sense of self-worth
  • They have a completely undeserved sense of accomplishment

The above are merely few things to describe what douchebags are like.

Below are photographic illustrations of a DOUCHEBAG:

If you are with a guy who looks anything close to the above or has any of the traits i mentioned, then rest assured that you are with a DOUCHEBAG!

Advice? Read this on and on and on and on and on. If by then you still don’t get it, then a douchebag is exactly what you deserve!

  1. July 6, 2011 at 7:01 am

    so funny

  2. popquine
    October 3, 2011 at 3:14 am

    lol I like it 🙂

  3. Leslie
    October 9, 2011 at 5:28 pm

    Everyone of these swarthy faggots are bent as a pigs tails, all riding the holes off each other on saturday night and people laughing at them on the street….priceless

  1. June 1, 2011 at 5:51 pm

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